Know Thyself

“Know Thyself” is possibly one of the most well-known aphorisms of all times. It was supposedly written at the entrance of the Temple of Apollo at Delphi, in Ancient Greece. Many thinkers, philosophers and writers throughout the centuries attempted to decipher the meaning underlying these two simple words. What did the Ancients mean? What kind of deep knowledge did they want to lead us to?

It’s interesting to note that even though we do not know exactly what was meant as the time, “know thyself” does mean something to each of us. It has resonance. We can all connect with something when hearing or reading these words. We all feel, inside, a sense of depth; of possibility; of mystery.

Here's one way to look at it. Who we are can often be encapsulated quite well by what we believe. We all hold many beliefs: beliefs about life, beliefs about what things are and aren’t, beliefs about others and beliefs about ourselves. These beliefs help us shape our everyday reality; they define our world and set its ways and boundaries. They craft and hold in place the way of being we show up as in life.

We created our own beliefs mostly during our childhood and teenage years; we continue to create them through adulthood but after a time, this creation process is achieved at a much slower pace. We created beliefs through our experiences, our social interactions, our families, our culture and so on. Among those beliefs, one category really stands out, because I believe it is the one which influences the quality of your life more than any other.

This category is composed of your beliefs about yourself.

What do you believe about yourself? What do you say to yourself, each and every day, about who you are, what you have done, where you are heading, what you can achieve? Who you are not, what you have not done, where can you not go, what you have not achieved? Many of these will constitute what is often called limiting beliefs.

The dictionary defines a belief as “an acceptance that something exists or is true, especially one without proof”.

If a belief is harmful to you, hurting you or limiting you in any way, shape or form, why would you accept it? Why would you keep it?

By definition, beliefs are not facts. Facts are facts. Beliefs are opinions. Limiting beliefs are opinions you have (in this case about yourself) which limit you and your possibilities. Stop reading now for 30 seconds, and reflect on the things you tell yourself about yourself that disempower you. That leave you feeling deflated, helpless, or small. Are you done?

Now, here's a process I've done many times with clients, and that can help you loosen the hard lines of your thinking about you. Who you are may not be as black and white as you think.

Which ones of your limiting beliefs would you say are objectively and absolutely true (i.e. backed by evidence and facts, with no evidence to the contrary)? If we were having a live conversation about it, chances are we would find out that very few actually are. Maybe none of them.

They are all opinions you think are true, and decided to call certainties. But what if you were to play a little game with yourself? What if you were to give a go, just for a minute, to believing that something else might be true? Think about the opposite of a limiting belief you have about you. For just a moment, fully immerse yourself into the absolute opposite of your previous opinion about yourself. When you hold that opposite thought in mind, ask yourself how might That actually be true? And look for evidence in your life that it is.

I believe we all have a limited and incomplete result when we think we “know ourselves”. We have not really explored all that we can be. We are often not even aware of what we believe about ourselves!

We are all on a spectrum; people are not black or white. Our traits, behaviours, qualities and flaws are not carved in stone saying: “this is what and who you are”. We evolve across limitless possibilities, but we settle for one thinking it's the truth.

I believe we have a CHOICE. I'm sure we could find evidence to the contrary (as I just stated above), but this belief is actually empowering me. It gives me access to more possibilities of being in the world. So that's what I decide to be.

We can CHOOSE to believe something different, if it serves us and enables us to unlock more of our potential. Change is easy, it is natural. Staying the same actually takes more effort, in the long run. You constantly have to tell yourself the same things over and over again to make sure you don’t budge.

In my work with clients, I found that two words can help us access this inner exploration of knowing ourselves:

What if…?

What if you were to tell yourself something different about you?

What if you were to identify what you currently believe, and question it?

What if you were to override the system and proactively change course?

What if you were able to create who you want to be?

What if?

What if?

What if?

We are more complex creatures than a few words or a few beliefs can describe. And we have a lot more agency in crafting who we are being in the world than we might think. But it starts with knowing where we are. Hence, know thyself.